Καλοπίκή Ειδήσεων (Kalopian News)

Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 6:28 am

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KRC looking to the Kalopian Worker's Party doorstep for cooperation - June 2800

"Since its appearance in the political foreground of Kalopian interests, the Kalopian Worker's Party has shown great compatibility with our goals and objectives, thus aligning in what I would personally like to call a friendly political spectrum", Mr. Ridikolos stated during a press conference earlier this morning. This has come without shock to the public, as both parties seem to be doing quite well with the latest legislative proposals springing up from the KRC dashboard, as well as documents presented from the KWP itself.

The question whether Mr. Ridikolos's intentions are truthful remains to be answered, as KRC administration currently awaits for KWP response to the above statements and calls for cooperation with the acknowledged party. At this point, it would be safe to estimate that the Kalopian Regime Coalition, and therefore Aristocrat himself, are looking for a secure web within the chaotic political forest in Kalopia, as more political parties come to rise after the extensive liberal period enjoyed by mostly foreigners within Kalopian boundaries. "Tourism has sprung up, we would never restrict our sexual liberation aroma. We only seek to enforce stability", was Mr. Aristocrat's response to what the party's positioning on the latest liberal trend is.
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 7:04 am

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Unavoidably interesting interview with Ridikolos Aristocrat - June 2800

It's been held as a tradition for each member of the Aristocrat family to come and pay us a visit here at the KRT studio. So, this evening, we shall be hosting Mr. Ridikolos Aristocrat, who is ladies and gentlemen a very busy man, and he has asked me to cut the crap and proceed towards the interview. In the flesh then, Mr. Ridikolos! Welcome to our humble studio.

"Thank you Roger, a pleasure it is."

Well, since you appear to be hasty, I shall move towards asking you the first question. How is it that nobody was ever able to track down your whereabouts?

"Aaah, splendid question indeed. Well, it's not very elaborate nor very secret, it's just the fact that I was doing business in Keymon. You have no idea how hard it was to unite all shareholders and finally manage to assemble the Aristocrat Ltd. once again. I've spent years in exile and I am glad my feet have finally stepped on familiar soil."

It's certainly a pleasure for us to have you here. Now, how is it that the KRC maintains such a relationship with its people? Don't you think cooperation with the KWP will lead towards losing your supporters? I've heard they are not much of a sexual type anyway...

"I think not. They seem to be on a regular balanced basis, and we'd certainly be willing to cooperate with them if they get a considerable amount of seats in the legislative assembly. I can imagine the mighty socialist regime standing in these lands. The KWP and the KRC, united, never to fail!"

Excellently put, Mr. Ridikolos. Now, proceeding to somewhat international affairs, and seeing that immigration policies have led towards populating neighboring Kafuristan with millions of people rooting to our lands, what is you party's stance on the upcoming and already taking place civil war there? Will Kalopia get actively involved soon to protect its people?

"We shall protect innocent lives and shall make no mistakes like the Liberal Urban Party or the communist rebels for that matter in Kafuristan, the ones causing all that trouble. We are no savages, dear Roger, but civilized, concerned people and we shall act upon our instinct in the best interest of our people and our lands. Since the end of the GPO, we have struggled to maintain stability within our ranks, but of course we have kept open immigration policies and have apparently succeeded in establishing a powerful Kalopian regime in Kafuristan as well. We support our brothers there and will help if necessary and if needed, but until things are determined properly, we shall remain on a neutral stance. Hence me requesting for a meeting with PPKD leadership."

Have they responded yet?

"I'm afraid that's government information."

Well, no harm in asking. Anyway, it seems that your call for Deltarian vessels to abandon Kafuri waters has thrown a certain air of mischief across your entire cabinet, Mr. Ridikolos. Care to elaborate on that particular announcement.

"As I have said, we wish to ensure stability in our attempts to protect innocent civilians. It would be unwise to proceed with irrational actions and rapid mobilizations that could be deemed as blatantly hostile and irreversibly aggressive. We are friends with neighboring Deltaria, and wish not to engage in any different situations. We don't want to, actually."

And what is your relationship with the Selucian communist regime?

"We shall have no ties with Selucian scum."

It seems your family has maintained quite a group of friends, extending even further into Majatran territory.

"It's always nice to have friends."

Aha, lovely, reassuring smile Mr. Ridikolos. Our country and proud nation is in good hands. I wish you the best. Thank you.

"Thank you, Roger."
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby Captain-Socialist » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:30 am

OOC: George, I think there is a misunderstanding. Selucia is the exact opposite of Communism, even our defence industries are private!
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:47 am

OOC: Misunderstanding? Hardly. There is always the option of ICly noting that by the way.
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby Captain-Socialist » Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:17 am

George wrote:OOC: Misunderstanding? Hardly.


OOC: How does mistaking a right-wing dictatorship for a communist regime count as "hardly" a misunderstanding?
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 11:13 am

OOC: I can say whatever I wish ICly mate. Contact me via PM if you want something more otherwise end it here, this is a newspaper.
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 12:51 pm

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Kalopia makes a more intense message against Deltarian involvement - July 2800

"We insist that Deltarians back away and remain in international waters", was Mr. Ridikolos's statement with regards to the recent announcement made by the PPKD of Kafuristan. "Involvement by third parties will only lead to further deaths and disorder. We ask that the Deltarians disregard PPKD orders and remain neutral in this conflict, at least for the time being."

On a sidenote, Mr. Aristocrat greatly supported the idea of a conference between the leaders of the mainly or at least somewhat or on the verge involved leaders of Terra in this current out of many Kafuri civil wars. He expressed his sincere concern on Kafuri matters and wishes all the best for the Kalopian leaders "out there in the hostile", as well as progress and peace. He also promised of "direct solutions and actions once things are settled properly", waving his hands promptly and smiling gently during this morning's press conference.

Meanwhile, new legislative proposals have arrived in the board, amongst which, although currently in heated debate, lies a document with regards to the establishment of a socialist regime in Kalopia, a proposal which was greatly praised by the Worker's Party. As a conclusion, it seems that political negotiations and last month's leadership meeting between the two parties ended in success. Now, only elections will light the road ahead.
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 1:03 pm

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KRC discussions with PPKD of Kafuristan end in success - July 2800

Caught shortly after his arrival in Polykratos International Airport, Mr. Ridikolos commented, despite being vague about certain questions, on his trip to Kafuristan and his meeting with PPKD leadership. "I am indeed pleased by the PPKD's hospitality and seriousness on these late disturbing events shocking Kafuristan", was his statement on the outcome of the PPKD discussions. "Everything, I assure you, turned out great and we look optimistically towards the future."

"We have reached quite an agreement and are ready to proceed towards implementing our plans", was his response as to the nature of the meeting. Various analysts and evasive representatives of the KRC spectrum have implied a certain business trade between the two coalitions of the neighboring nations, nevertheless, we have no sources to confirm something solid at this point. It is suspected that decisions and mobilizations will be made soon by the Kalopian government and perhaps military.
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:07 pm

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Ridikolos Aristocrat praises new Vanuku Neutrality Accords - September 2800

After the recent announcement from the government of Vanuku with regards to the release of the newly drafted neutrality accords, Mr. Ridikolos proceeded towards commenting on the latest actions. "A wonderful opportunity to promote peace indeed. We hope that through the ratification of these accords a new solid and friendly relationship will be cultivated between Vanuku and our wonderful nation Kalopia."

It is uncertain whether Kalopia will move towards drafting further treaties with regards to the two nation alliance mentioned, nevertheless, the KRC has already proposed the ratification of the aforementioned treaty. "Mr. Liekombie may visit hot Kalopia anytime he wants. We are deeply hospitable."
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Re: Kalopian Republican Times - KRT

Postby GreekIdiot » Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:58 pm

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Massive military mobilizations on the screen - October 2800

During the last days of September, various reports had crossed our desks with regards to unprecedented mobilizations within military positions across Kalopia. It is now confirmed that these speculations are valid as we have a new press release documented and presented to the public by Mr. Ridikolos Aristocrat.

"We are in times of danger, my friends. Our brothers out there in the harsh Kafuri front need our help, and we shall give it to them, for we are men with honor, with warm hearts and dreams! Mrs. Athelda and I have ordered the mobilization of a massive section of our national military, while we are currently equipping Mossavi airports with bombers and fighters from across our military bases. We shall not step into foreign territory and nor shall attempt to wage unnecessary wars against no one. Consider this as merely a precaution, as a reaching hand ready to help our poor brothers and sisters in Kafuristan, who are slowly being tortured to death by communist scum."
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