Seko

[Iori]

Welcome to SNN (Sekowo News Network) the largest news organization in Sekowo.


While historically SNN had been a paper & broadcast news agency the modern SNN is primarily a
network & broadcast new organization, broadcasting stories live both on television and the Internet.



Thank-you for tuning into SNN, the most trusted name in Sekowan news.

[Iori]

Welcome to SNN mobile, your news at your speed.
We have several news-stories to report.


DSP Celebrates 300th Anniversary:

The Democratic Socialists Party celebrated the parties 300th anniversary this month.


Fireworks explode above the cruise liners the celebrations were held on.

The DSP is not only the oldest party in Sekowo, but the single longest continuously existing party in the nations history.

The anniversary however has not been unanimously met with celebrations as seen in some street interviews in which
some wished for the party to disband.
In light of this we've prepared a report on a theoretical disbandment of the party.

The DSP, being the oldest party, has over the time gained a great degree of clout within and outside of the political arena,
the shortened version of the report [for the full report please visit our website for the link] paints a rather grim picture.
While the party would'nt fall apart, the worst case scenario, in which the party, a majority of it's supporters,
its leadership and assets all left the country, would result in an economic recession in the country as an estimated
710 billion DCU in capital left the country and many of Sekowo's largest corporations and companies moved out of
Sekowo do to their being controlled by the company and its supporters. It's estimated it would take two decades
for the country to fully revive economically.



This has been an SNN mobile broadcast.
Thank-you for tuning into SNN and have a great day.

[Khaler]

Sekowo celebrates today a great moment in their history, as it has been exactly 5 years since the last proposal was introduced in Folkstämma. The people gathered outside to celebrate the fact that politicians haven't done anything in five years. Last elections were in 2741, after two years of no action in the Folkstämma, but for some weird reason the people went on and voted anyway.

"This is most likely the greatest term we have ever had. No politicans betrayd their voters as no proposals or no campaigning was made. Everyone just voted for fun!" said a man to SNN in the middle of the celebrations.

The political parties have been silent also, no new cabinets have been proposed since, and some even believe that everyone inside Folkstämma are dead.

"They went in the building five years ago to vote for Government agricultural and farming subsidies policy, and we haven't heard of them ever since. They didin't come out at all. And after that, no-one enters the building, as it was privte session. Not even Tennõ Reynard, who is basically our top political leader now that the C'valyi is still inside the building", said political analysist Übahr Faghyl Emo-Animifanno.

"The issue on agricultural and farming subsidies must be very hard as they are still discussing about it", said another man, but Emo-Animifanno corrected him. "Well, the decission on that matter was released, so they voted on the matter. Why they are still inside is not known though. A windowcleaner said he smelled something weird while he was cleaning the Folkstämma Building's windows, and that is just most likely the stench coming from one of the reprsentatives of Kazulian Origin.

And in other news today:
* The Sekowan Anime Picture Association (SAPA) and the National Childporn Association (NCA) unite their strenght because of the similiar target audiences.
* The Aircraft Carrier Industry hits all time low: Only 14 carriers produced daily!
* The amount of EMO's is falling. Does this bring more problems for the Democratic Socialists Party in the future elections?
* Seko-Cola™ can cure cancer?
* Does Gay Polygamy spread aids?
* How will the Elephants and Whales vote in the next elections?


*** This show is brought to you by: Seko-Cola Zero™! ****
*** If you are watching this live feed on the internet from Deltaria, despite the terrible death penalty that you will get from watchin foreign media, try Seko-Cola Deltaria™, the new taste from Seko-Cola™ Company! It is pure water!***

[GreekIdiot]

OOC: Lol, that was terribly funny! Nice one khaler.

[JuliaAJA]

OOC: Lol, that was terribly funny! Nice one khaler.

OOC: Yeah. Also, you forgot Bei-Cola and W-K-R-A-D Multimedia's rebroadccasting of everything.

[Khaler]

Breaking News!


C'valyi Jaques Couteille after exiting the Folkstämma.


Today, the C'valyi Jaques Couteille and several other notable politicians exited the Folkstämma building. The entire legislateure, the representatives and the senators have been locked inside the building for over five years before this day for unknown reasons. When first approached for questions, the 80-year old C'valyi asked for the result of the elections.

"See, when we locked ourselves up back in the day, CUTE only had 174 seats. Now we have 200. It was worth it. Oh, and also, if you are looking for the representatives of Free Workers Party, we aaahm... well... they were tasty... youknow... we ran out of food and... well.. cannibalism is not illegal in Sekowo, right? Or is it?"

In few hours the Folkstämma was back up and running, with proposals flying in the air. The real reason why the politicians locked themselves up is still a mystery.

And in other news today:
* A Brand new Doctoral Thesis asks: Why do these lunatic world domination organisations pop up every 50 years?
* Several restaurants have been closed because their doors and premises are racist: Sekowan citizens of Whale and Elephant ethnicites are unable to dine in them!

After the commercials, be sure to see the great debate on rights of viruses: Should we give HIV the position of sentient being and thus, make them equal to humans like Whales and Elephants?

"Well, they are sentient for sure, I mean, they target gay people."
"Sure, but if we agree that they are sentient, our jails are going to be packed with murderers!"

"Super Politics Anime" after these messages!


SUPER POLITICS ANIME! The only political conversation program on entire terra that is ANIME!
Debaters today, from left to right: Crazy Levitating Blind-Guy, Super Mecha Über Warrior, Helmet-Joe and Passively Agressive EMO Kid representing the Social Democratic views.
The conversation is led by our host, the Longhaired Dude who looks like a girl (as seen on the background)

[mentalist]

Luthori to buy Sekowan Colonies
Includes northern portion of Tropica Island and land south of the Caltropic Lakes; believed to be largest real estate transaction in history

Delegates from Sekowo and Luthori during negotiations


Kasmenai Federal Metropolis, Sekowo- The Foreign Ministry announced today that a deal has been reached to sell the northern portion of Tropica Island and a large piece of land south of the Caltropic Lakes to the Holy Luthori Empire as the Sekowan government continues to search for much needed funding since the onset of a major budget crisis in Kasmenai. "This deal is historic for both Sekowo and Luthori," Sekowan Foreign Minister Theo Taylor said at a press conference. "It will lead to stability in our government and will return prosperity to this nation."

"The Holy Luthori Empire is very happy we have been able to reach an agreement, as this will greatly contribute to our nation," Luthorian Foreign Minister Frederick Rannigan, 6th Duke of Utagia, said.

The agreement will transfer the northern half of the large southern island of Tropica and a narrow strip of land south of the Caltropic Lakes and west of the Carina Neck from Sekowo to Luthori for $5,000,000,000 SEK in what is believed to be the largest real estate transaction in history. The land near the Caltropic Lakes is believed to be especially valuable, as it includes mountains rich in resources as well as access to the ocean. Tropica Island is also rich in resources, but its real value to Luthori is believed to be its position southeast of Luthori's colonies on Squibble. The Tropican purchase will make Luthori one of the most powerful forces in the southern region.

The deal has recieved the support of every member of the Sekowan Federal Cabinet, who have been searching desperately for a solution to a devastating budget crisis. Earlier this year, the governing coalition, made up of members of the libertarian-leaning Elitist Party and the leftist Democratic Socialist Party, enacted major tax cuts designed to reduce the tax burden on the poor. Unfortunately, the legislation only served to deprive the government of much needed revenue, causing the legislature to drastically slash the budgets of the government ministries. The deal is hoped to not only bring in much needed cash, but to reduce the financial burden the colonies have on the national government.

While the news was greeted with a negative reaction by some in Sekowo, it is widely believed that the treaty will be ratified by the legislatures of both Sekowo and Luthori.


Planned Division of Tropica Island


Location of planned new Luthori colonies on Dovani, west of the Carina Neck

[Iori]

OOC:
Sekowo's states can not be sold.

Honestly I'mg etting tired of your stupid bullshit coming in and trying to destroy Sekowo because you don't fucking like it.

[GreekIdiot]

OOC: Thread locked pending moderation investigation.

[GreekIdiot]

OOC: Matter solved. Perfectly legit, the report has been closed. Thread opened again.