Hanzen Times

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Hanzen Times

Postby Blockerz92 » Tue May 16, 2017 3:00 am

This is the official news agency of the Kingdom of Hanzen.
Check out the latest headlines and the hottest topics in Hanzen in Today in Hanzen.
Check out the daily news in the Royal Parliament and other more news in Hanzen politics and royalty in Hanzen Royal Bulletin.
Check out the latest trends and reports of the popular culture and lifestyle in Hanzen Daily Life.
Check out the reports on Hanzen's world affairs with other colonials in Hanzen Global.
This is Hanzen Times!
Blockerz92
 
Posts: 32
Joined: Sat Feb 11, 2017 3:17 am

Re: Hanzen Times

Postby Blockerz92 » Tue May 16, 2017 3:19 am

HANZEN ROYAL TIMES

King of Hanzen Dead

August 25, 4211, 3:49 AM, King Zhen Wechsupaporn was declared dead with the case of his deceased left unsolved. They say that the King had a tumor on one of his arteries that clogged the path of the blood.
In 10:00 AM, the King's remains shall be delivered to its final resting.
The Royal Funeral Committee declared a mourning period on August 25- September 30.
All bars and alcohol outlets were closed and all concerts, local or foreign are postponed. All flags were raised halfmast and a national curfew was set.
The successor has not yet been decided and the throne is left empty.
The Queen of Hanzen, Queen Wang Wechsupaporn shall take over the throne while the Royal Committee decides who will succeed the throne.

Tian Guo
Correspondent from the Royal Palace of Hanzen
This is from Hanzen Times signing off.
Blockerz92
 
Posts: 32
Joined: Sat Feb 11, 2017 3:17 am

Re: Hanzen Times

Postby Blockerz92 » Tue May 16, 2017 7:36 am

HANZEN ROYAL TIMES

All Hail the Queen?

After days of retracing back to the Wechsupaporn Royal Dynasty, the next successor leads to a peasant living in the distant lands of Northern Hanzen.
It is a girl named Jian Majaviralongkorn. She was found in a fishing village in Northeastern Henzan.
The Royal Committee says that she was the lost royal of Hanzen named Lin Wechsupaporn, the only child and daughter of Xiao Wechsupappron and last Empress of Northeastern Henzan.
Henzan was divided into 8 kingdoms, Northeastern Henzan, Northwestern Henzan, Great North Henzan, Great East Henzan, Southeast Henzan, Great South Henzan, Southwestern Henzan and Great West Henzan. The Great North Henzan was dominated and ruled by the Wechsupaporn Royal Dynasty.
The King of Great North Hanzen constructed a peace pact together due to a land dispute.
His youngest son, Xiao Wechsupaporn married the Princess of Northeast Henzan whixh eventually became the last Empress of Northeast Henzan. They gave birth to a girl named Lin.
The successor, Yuan Wechsupaporn attempted to siege the Palace due to his powerhungry traits. The Empress and Xiao were left dead. The little girl was lost and were found by a family in a fishing village.
The Queen accepted the expected heir to the throne.

The Secretary General of the Royal Party opposes in this matter:
She was an offspring of our past enemy. We cannot let her acquire the prestigious throne.
In fact, she grew as a peasant. It is a disgrace!
The Wechsupaporn Dynasty is very diverse, there must be someone eligible enough to acquire the throne unlike this mutty fraud!


The Royal Palace didn't reply on the outburst on the Secretary General of the Royal Party.

Tian Guo
Correspondent from the Royal Palace of Hanzen
This is from Hanzen Times signing off.
Blockerz92
 
Posts: 32
Joined: Sat Feb 11, 2017 3:17 am

Re: Hanzen Times

Postby CCP » Fri Jun 01, 2018 11:21 pm

HANZEN ROYAL TIMES
Image

Fuck the Queen says Prime Minister Babpiboon

The Hanzen Ratthasapha voted yesterday to give support to For Hanzens! party leader Kamnan Babpiboon. Babpiboon has long served as the mayor of àat-yaa-gam where he was accused of widespread murders and government corruption. The newly-minted prime minister says he'll bring that same no-nonsense approach to the national government.
Look sometime kill. If need shit do, you shoot. See cause this soft shit law police court rights human rights, all shit. This Indrala thing. Indrala is liars. You know cause they has communistic party, communistic government! They don't like democratic. So why they try to put this on me?! Democratic is stupid. People is stupid, people lazy. Dumb shits believe anything for tv. Like Saridan, look how easy Spencer get country. Just say dumb shits for tv and democracy big democracy big freedom believe words of him, dumb shits climb into cage, climb in work camp, climb into oven for him. Like frog for boiling pot Artania say it. Democracy dumb shits bad for country. You need it done, just do. Just shoot. Dumb shits speak wrong, just shoot. Cause right or wrong, you know right or wrong. Don't need for vote every time right or wrong. Just do right not wrong. Like if I was mayor, I was mayor for long time in àat-yaa-gam. Sometime weak shit soldier come, kid soldier, some dumb shit give gun when kid 6, or 8 years. Say protect, say guard. Kid soldier don't know for shit what mean. They walk all round with gun, like movie. Then grow up, come me and say 'what I do mayor,' I say dumb shit you dumb? What gun for? Why gun? What do gun? They say wrong, just shoot. You dumb shit ask dumb question. You gun, you law. Fuck law, have gun. Cause is true for Hanzen too. Have gun, fuck law. Do right or go dead bye! Yea Hanzen got gun, got big gun, got nuke. Think joke? Not joke. Real. Real real. big gun. Big nuke. Fuck you up. Don't fuck up. Be right or we shoot go bye!


Asked about the health and public role of the Queen, the Prime Minister said the following:

Fuck Queen. She dumb shit. You know she mongrel? Is not right? She mut! Her mâe pussy is just whore for man. Her mâe live with trannies in whore town. I kill all for whores. They dirt, they disease. I try fuck whore long time get disease. Cause whore didn't have pussy. No pussy. Whore was tranny. I say fuck bitch die. So I shoot. Cause right. But Queen mâe is whore. I know I fuck Queen's mâe. Fuck Queen. She 395 years or some shit. Dumb. Dead. Fuck Queen. I make new king. She die. Get real king. King only, no woman for king. King only.


Reporters asked the Prime Minister about his foreign policy objectives:

Yeah me buy Vorona. Vorona dumb shit. Just dirt, not for real country hehehh. Is shit place. I buy. They give me for good low cost. If don't do right right, I shot. I have big gun. They give for me. Cause I nuke world. But no Saridan. We help Saridan. They good place Saridan.


Tian Guo
Correspondent from the Royal Palace of Hanzen
This is from Hanzen Times signing off.
CCP
 
Posts: 795
Joined: Sat Jun 19, 2010 4:24 am

Re: Hanzen Times

Postby CCP » Sat Jun 02, 2018 12:56 am

HANZEN ROYAL TIMES

Prime Minister Inks Secret Deal to Buy Vorona

Investigative reports have uncovered evidence of a negotiations held between the governments of Hanzen and Alduria where the Aldurian government agreed to sell Vorona to Hanzen for an undisclosed price. Alduria's only condition?: Just make sure to remove the generic Luthori-Dundorfian and replace them with good Luthori-Dundorfians." Prime Minister Kamnan Babpiboon was heard to reply, "Deal! How much?"

Tian Guo
Correspondent from the Royal Palace of Hanzen
This is from Hanzen Times signing off.
CCP
 
Posts: 795
Joined: Sat Jun 19, 2010 4:24 am

Re: Hanzen Times

Postby CCP » Wed Jun 13, 2018 7:02 pm

HANZEN ROYAL TIMES
Image

With Plans to Aid Xampa Ally, Hanzen Puts Child Soldiers on Utembo Border

Hanzen Prime Minister Kamnan Babpiboon has ordered the Hanzen military to beef up deployments along the Utemban border. The Prime Minister explained his reasons at a press conference:
Yeah, know you say 'thought don't like Wangdue!' 'thought say he bad king?!' Yeah, I say that. I say. Wangdue big bitch. He bitch. It true, it true! But he my bitch. See negotiation? See deal? He broke. He beg me weapons. I run deal. I own deal. I own Wangdue. He my bitch. Is true yeah. But what this shit Utembo? What this shit?! Wangdue call me say 'Utembo stop my rubber. Utembo no want trade.' I say Wangdue 'don't be bitch king.' I say him protect his self. I say him Xsampa fucked, fucked, fucked if he don't protect, if he be bitch. I say 'don't be ladyboy Wangdue!' I say 'don't be queen! Be king! King shoot. King kill. King no scared! King fight!' But he still bitch, so I say him 'Look Wangdue, I help, cause you bitch, I know you scared. So I help. I fight Utembo too. We fight too. Cause you bitch, you don't know how make good fight. I know how. I kill. Stop talk, just kill. Kill then take rubber.'


Tian Guo
Correspondent from the Royal Palace of Hanzen
This is from Hanzen Times signing off.
CCP
 
Posts: 795
Joined: Sat Jun 19, 2010 4:24 am


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